Hi WhiteZeo!

Its me! I am finally making my way over with feedback! Are you proud? I thought about it today, and since I like drove right past a part of your campus, I was like, Hey! Ill get started on her feedback! That was thought that flew through my head sometime in the span of time between passing your campus and the car ride over to UC to have lunch with my friend. ::grins::

Did I tell you that I liked it? I did! It wasnt full of happiness and cute fuzzy bunnies, but it was good! I thought it gave some little piece of information on how Shayla and Thane are dealing with things. Did I mention that I like the Thane-y-ness of things? I really do. ::nods:: Mmm hmmm. It is really making me happy that there is more of him in it. I would like to see a bit more of Merrick, preferably conscious. And if you are in a really good mood, a little Merrick/Shayla goodness would be much appreciated. ::grins::

What did I like the most about this . . . Hmmm . . . Let me see . . . Theres this . . .

Quote:
WhiteZeo originally wrote:

For quite a long time, the two remained in silence, drawing some semblance of comfort from the other's presence. The cold breeze blew through open windowpanes, playing with Thane's hair and only emphasizing its unruliness. His gaze remained steadily focused on his sister, and in turn, her large, haunted eyes focused on something outside the window, beyond her reach.


That was a nice little visual we got there. And I like Thanes unruly hair. Heehee! It is all cute with its messyness. Heehee! And I am not very articulate at the moment, but I dont really care. Making up words as you need them is part of the fun of being tired and unable to thing. You come up with things like Thane-y-ness and messyness and if you are really tired, you can make up words that should be something else like experimentational. Haha! I was really tired when I made that one up!

Poor Shayla. She is so young and now she is suffering from a person withdrawal. I bet it is just horrible for her. The way Meghana described everything, Shayla isnt doing as well as some would hope. She is basically the way you would think.

Quote:
WhiteZeo originally wrote:

"How is Merrick?"

Thane was thrown by his sister's first words. He expected her to talk about Opaline, not her son. "I...don't know," he hesitated, confused and unsure of what exactly was the appropriate answer to such a question. "We didn't find him yet."

Quickly, she flipped over onto her left side to face her older brother. "Why haven't you found him yet?!" she demanded, almost petulantly.


Awww! Is it wrong of me to find that cute? I think it might be. But I cant help it. The first thing that she says is what she wants to know, and she wants to know if Merrick is all right. That is cute, even though the circumstances arent that wonderful. And then the whole thing where he is still missing, and she is even more upset about that . . . well, I just find that to be so cute! It is nice to know that even when she is completely and utterly depressed, she is still herself . . . sorta. Look at Shayla, with the caring and the worrying and all that stuff that is Shayla!

Quote:
WhiteZeo originally wrote:

The young prince was surprised by how hard her question hit him. High Priestess Opaline and Queen Lyrissa were two different people, but he still felt as if he was living his mother's death over again as the same pain continued to wash over him. Within him, he felt his heart squeeze tightly; he couldn't, and he wouldn't, answer.


And even though Thane is like what . . . how many years older than Shayla is he? Like eight or something? I dont know why, but I think he is at least twice her age. ::shrugs:: How old is Thane anyway?

But back to the point . . . Even though Thane is so much older than Shayla, and he could actually remember some things about his mother, he still thinks of Opaline as his mother also. That deserves another awww, dont you think? It is just such a bad situation right now. After finding another mother she dies as well because of just really bad circumstances. Shayla might even be thinking (irrationally, yes) that she just brings bad luck with her because of what happened: the early snow storm while Merrick was out there on his hunt, her mother, and then Opaline, and now not being able to find Merrick. :(

Quote:
WhiteZeo originally wrote:

Thane smiled softly at her. How was it that she was so young, and yet, so selfless? Overlooking her own sadness and emptiness, she still managed to think of others and not herself. She was truly a bright light in an otherwise bleak time. "If that is what you want"

"It is what I want."


Now that is just undeniably Shayla. I think that is her at her best. And Thane did such a great job understanding it all. He is such an awesome big brother. Dont you think? And I think that when all this is over, when she somehow deals with this all and gets past it, that she is going to be an even brighter light in Animaria a beacon of sorts to the people. Oh, how the people will love her. She was the princess that they had longed for and been gifted with, and now she is going to be the shining example. She is going to be an epitome of strength, compassion, and consideration for everyone. I can tell. The only thing now is how is she going to get past it? How long will it take for this hole inside her to truly heal?

So . . . What is due to happen in #8? Heehee! :)

~Sugarplum
"The reason it hurts so much to separate
is because our souls are connected . . .
And I know I have spent every life before this one
searching for you.
For your soul and mine must always come together."
~ Noah Calhoun, The Notebook by Nicholas Sparks ~



May you find some comfort here
Outer Haven